Sure, but who wouldn't be?

"Let me start by saying the women of my generation have a reason to be fired up."

This is what you said in a dream. Not to me -- I read them in an interview. Your face (and your hair, and your mouth -- you wore a lot of lipstick in the photo, if you'll forgive my saying so) was on the cover of American Legion, which I think is a magazine my dad gets from his union. There were pictures inside, too -- you with all of the women of your family, most of whom I have never seen in life, and another where you are sitting down next to a white picket fence, using it to brace yourself as you stretch one leg high in the air and flash and embarrassed smile at the camera, presumably for being photographed so in the first place. It's an infectious and endearing smile. There's a young man in the foreground, stealing a glance at you. I don't feel jealous. I think, "Yeah, no kidding."

In the background of that photo -- or perhaps in an accompanying photograph is a seaside town on a hill, with a clock tower, an old movie theater, streets that are winding and not wide. The photo caption describes this town as a "lazy seaside" place you pass through every day by train, and that it's come to have special meaning to you.

On the magazine's cover you are proclaimed as the face of a new movement of young women, one that inspires more and more to "receive catechism." I'm not sure if that even makes sense as a phrase -- I get easily confused when it comes to religious ceremonies. I understand that it is (or was meant to be) different from communion. But then again, maybe not. In any event, the article's author proclaims that, as charming and true as you are, she was not convinced to forgive God on your account.

I didn't find out anymore, I'm afraid. I settled down with the magazine but woke up after that first line: "Let me start by saying the women of my generation have a lot to be fired up about." And then, "Let me find you the women of North Kokomo, Indiana," at which point I believed you played a piece of audio for the interviewer. At this point I was probably a little jealous.

>>Interlude<<

Last night I had a dream that I moved back to my old house in downtown Oakland, and all the old cats had been dropped off there as well. My old/new roommate said my ex-girlfriend had left them there the day before, saying it was for "a month or two."

I was really happy to see Tubby again. I picked him up and it still felt like carrying a baby horse.

But then I kept finding pee everywhere -- my bed, the floor, behind books. And when I woke up it was one of those take-a-moment-to-remember-it-wasn't-a-dream reactions. And though it would have been nice to hang out with Wolf again, it was also nice to not have to look out for pee on my blankets.

We won't hear your dreams, unless you really, really want us to

The house is bigger than anyone can tell. No, bigger isn't the word - it's the size of a house, as it should be. But it's more expansive inside, there are balconies without a clear path to reach them. And once reached, without a clear path away. But again, "balcony" isn't the right word - "loft" is better.

The point: the outside has four walls, and clearly defined beginnings and beginnings, but on the inside there are doors that open, and no map to where they lead.

There's a boy there, and a girl. They have shared history. They're acquaintances, but here's the thing: they are closer now than they ever were before, not because of a thing that they've gone through, but because of a thing they haven't gone through quite yet. Time goes both directions. They don't have the memories yet of what they'll experience, but they have the inner knowledge of what the experiences will bring.

A quick one before the shuttle

(And then last night I had a dream that George Strait was sitting next to me at some kind of cafeteria lunch, but I was kind of a dick to him. But it was because he had his boots off and was putting his feet up on the table.)

I was an ensign

I had a dream last night that I was playing the Star Trek: The Next Generation Interactive VCR board game ... only I was playing it with Captain Picard, Riker, and Worf.

Usually my dreams tend toward pretty ordinary but uncomfortable things, like I'm working at my old bookstore again, or I've moved back in with my folks, or the brakes on my car don't work anymore. I've always wanted to have those dreams where you get to fight with lightsabers or fly spaceships.

So if the closest I can come is pretending to fly spaceships with fictional characters that fly fictional spaceships? I guess I'll take it. Riker was into the game, but Picard got bored pretty fast.



There are stickers that came with the game that look like the Star Trek communicator badge, and I was wondering if the other guys would stick them on over their ACTUAL badges, or like put them to the side, or what. But then I forgot to pass them out.